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America Collectively Vomits in Mouth After Seeing Jimmy Carter Kiss a Wrinkled Sack of Tissue

at 12:31 pm | By

Lots of regurgitated hot dogs make it into America’s mouth.

Last night, every American vomited in their own mouth…at the same time. Not sure exactly why but this morning, when they did it again, more¬†disturbing images resurfaced.


carter kissing his wife

Source: Twitter @TODAYshow

Good God…

That’s Jimmy Carter, an old fart bag president, making out with what seems like a melted candle, but turned out to be his wife. As the kiss cam at an Atlanta Braves game came upon the couple, America’s stomachs began to gurgle and heave uncontrollably. As the two toothless, drooling sacks of rubbery skin locked lips, hot dogs, pizza, tacos, and more came rushing out of America’s stomachs and into their mouths.

As you can expect, the Atlanta Braves lost the game as they too, began vomiting uncontrollably. Of course, the Toronto Bluejays, not caring what kind of demented, sick films America was trying to make, destroyed the Braves with a 5-0 win. All thanks to Carter and his floozy wife.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t the end of Carter, almost half of America blacked out after Jimmy Carter followed up his appearance on the kiss cam with one on a blowjob cam.

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