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Art School Cuts Art From Program Calls It Art

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The Minneapolis College of Art and Design announced this week that they will be pulling art from all of its program due to the word “art.” What that means is the daring school has decided the most artful thing that they could do to show how arty they are is removing the word “art” from the school and the students vocabulary.

“First we were thinking of maybe saying ‘f*ck art’ because, like, what does it even mean anyway, you know?” Dean of students Cherish Featherbomb admitted, “But then it was like, what if defining art is totally not art at all? And we decided then to just take it completely out of the curriculum.”

“Anything can be art,” said one student who hadn’t showered in months, “But going to a school that tries to pigeon hole what I’m doing into some kind of definition is complete Fascism,” he said as he stood over a can of beans a spit into it. “This is probably art.”

As for classes, they’ll be taking a big turn. Painting will no longer be in studios, but at people’s homes, on their walls, and one color. Textiles will include sewing buttons on shirts, and fixing holes in denim. Wood-working will include putting up dry wall, and New Media will teach students how to install light switches. “We think this new approach to art, will help students learn the skills that they’ll need in the real world.” said Dean Featherbomb, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to eat this can of beans a student left for me on my desk.”

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