New Jersey Governor Chris Christie recently ordered the head of his state’s national guard to lose weight while eating an entire stick of butter like a banana. Governor Christie, who regularly fills his coffee mugs with Alfredo sauce, is drawing criticism for the decision.
For his part, the Republican Presidential candidate that uses mayonnaise as chap stick, has largely ignored the criticism.
“I understand the irony, but as a leader, I must do what’s right for my state, even if it causes me some personal embarrassment,” Christie told a group of reporters before coughing, which led to an entire 12 inch meatball sub falling out his mouth.
New Jersey resident Anthony Deguidolianno, supports Christie’s decision, saying “Ey, one time I seen him eat 20 sweet Italian sausages. That’s my kinda governor.”
At press time, Chris Christie was modifying one of those hats with beer cans on them so that he could drink gravy from it instead.
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Tells state troopers to jog more while drinking nacho cheese directly from the pump.