A dead Raccoon discovered on a Toronto sidewalk last week has a higher approval rating than the city’s former Mayor, Rob Ford.
In a theoretical race for Mayor between Ford and the raccoon, the dead scavenger outpolled the bloated, former drug addict by a 90% margin.
“I feel so much more comfortable with my city being associated with this rotting carcass of a garbage eating animal than I do with it being associated with Rob Ford,” said Toronto transplant Edward Cohen.
Another resident, Martha Bell, remarked “At least this dead scavenger isn’t going to smoke crack in office.”
The results weren’t unanimous though, as one citizen, Bryan Carter, did express nostalgia for the Rob Ford era, “He may have been a terrible choice to lead Toronto, but it was pretty hilarious when the mayor of a major city was talking about going down on his wife at a press conference.”
At press time, the raccoon had been picked up and disposed of by Toronto Animal Services, while Ford is probably somewhere wearing a Hawaiian Shirt with a prominent gravy stain on it.
— Ilona Biro (@ilona_biro) July 10, 2015
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