In an effort to make citizens feel safer around screaming, homeless maniacs, the New York Homeless Services has passed out Bluetooth headsets to all men and women who are without a place to live.
“What we noticed,” admitted president of operations Aaron Mulligan, “is that regular pedestrians aren’t afraid of normal people yelling on the sidewalk, as long as they have a Bluetooth headset. So, we figured if we put the headsets on some of the craziest of our homeless men and women, pedestrians might not fear them as much.”
The experiment has worked surprisingly well with pedestrians making eye contact with them and going so far as smiling. Several of the homeless were even offered jobs right on the street. “Quite amazing,” said Mulligan. “Next we’re thinking of giving our Brooklyn homeless stupid hats and Ray-Bans to blend in with the people in Williamsburg.”