While there are serious issues in Syria, with thousands of refugees trying to find a new home, and an immigration problem that, through Republican eyes, is rampant, and a terrorist threat that is continuously looming, there’s one issue that Americans are refusing to talk about. A genocide so sickening that it makes Americans, even the highest in power, want to turn their cheeks. They’d rather avoid the rising numbers of deaths, the cruel and violent slaughtering, and the end result: riots, stampedes, and gluttonous monsters roaming the streets greedy for more.
The genocide I’m talking about, of course, is one that hits very close to home. One on American soil. That’s right, the annual genocide of turkeys.
Every year in America millions of turkeys are slaughtered and all we do is laugh. We mock them with terrible hand drawings by children, and a parade that ends with a character from a completely separate holiday. Santa Claus has nothing to do with Thanksgiving and yet we give him full seniority on a holiday that is allowing the majestic turkey to lose its life to the blade of a butcher.
I for one, will not stand it. This year, I will eat Tofurkey, a completely natural…soy… Is that gravy? Wow. That real turkey smells amazing. The skin is so crispy. Maybe I’ll just have a bite. Okay, back off get your own leg! NOM NOM NOM.
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