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Video Game Hall of Fame Massacre: Game Over for Mario and Others

at 12:56 pm | By
shooting at banquet hall

(Photo by Mark Davis/Getty Images for Turner Image / deviant / woopwoopwoop11)

Tragedy at the First Annual Video Game Hall of Fame Banquet. While many attendees were enjoying a montage of Mario and Donkey Kong through their tumultuous history, a crazed gunman stormed through the hall, releasing round after round of bullets on the innocent victims.

The gunman, later identified as “Doom Guy,” switched between a pistol, chaingun, rocket launcher, and plasma gun, to destroy fans of video games along with some of its inductees. Mrs. Ghost, formerly known as Ms. Pacman, wept over the body of her ex-husband, PacMan, as he lay dead from rocket launcher explosions. Luigi swore revenge for his brother’s death while Bowser laughed manically at the horror.

Doom Guy may have eliminated the entire banquet hall if it wasn’t for a rogue, L-shaped, block that fell from the sky and landed directly on him. The creators of Tertris commented, “We’d been looking for that block for years. Glad it finally found its place.”